Why a lot of Africans need to learn basic Manners

As someone who travels a lot—to my own country, Ghana, and to many other countries, I appreciate the cost of traveling including plane tickets and accommodation.

I wouldn’t pack my bag and head to China, Israel, Ukraine, Poland, Egypt, Morocco, Togo, Qatar, Dubai, Germany, Sweden, Belgium, Italy, Luxemburg, Netherlands, or any of the countries I have been or intend to go—without having enough money for my own accommodation for the entire duration of the trip.

Similarly, I wouldn’t buy a plane ticket and head to Ghana without having money to pay for a place to stay—and target a friend or family member’s private residence as my “hotel”.

Yet, a lot of Africans travel abroad for holidays only to go and inconvenience others by going to stay in their private houses—as if these places are hotels.

A lot of Africans need to learn basic manners, especially as we grow. If you can’t afford a lifestyle, don’t engage in it. If you cannot afford to travel (which includes accommodation, don’t travel).

On the other hand, Africans abroad also do the same. If you do not have your house or a family home in your home country where you have a locus, you shouldn’t buy a plane ticket and head back home—only to go and hijack someone’s private residence as your own—as if it was a hotel or Airbnb.

Even with several Airbnb properties scattered around in need of bookings, Africans will still travel back home or abroad to go and “squat” in another person’s house—without caring about their own convenience or that of the host.

How do you even stay in someone’s house like that and be comfortable?

When I visit friends with spare rooms even within the UK, I still book my hotel or Airbnb.

Sometimes, someone may offer you his or her private residence to stay out of courtesy. You are not supposed to take it. This is just basic sense. Just say thank you and find your own accommodation.

I have several friends who visit the UK every year (including Kwame A Plus, Kwasi Aboagye, Dr. Adu Boateng, Amankwa Agyeman, and Lawyer Gaspar Lyle Nii-Aponsah whose photo I am using for this post) and none of them come to stay at my private residence. If they can’t afford a hotel, why the heck are they even coming to the UK?

I also visit Ghana a lot each year and I have several good friends in Ghana including the above-mentioned. But I do not go and burden any of them with my accommodation needs. I make sure I do not turn someone’s private house into my own or a hotel—even if they offer.

It’s different if the person has a spare property where he or she does not live which you may be offered. Even that, make sure you give the person some money to cover maintenance and the bills. Pay just as you would have paid for a hotel or Airbnb—after all, it is someone’s investment.

I recently went to Kumasi. I have friends and family in Kumasi with houses, but I ended up staying at Ridge Condos for my own comfort, self-respect, and above all to respect my friends and family’s right to privacy.

Not long ago, a friend’s cousin came from Germany to live with her in Ghana (on a visit). The supposed one-week visit turned into 1 month and during this one month, the cousin kept bringing visitors to the friend’s private house where she lives with her husband and children.

She said she would return from work to meet strangers as many as 3 people sitting in her living room watching TV—these were guests of her cousin. What the heck?

She would be in her kitchen and someone she does not know would barge in to take a glass–a guest of her cousin she is hosting.

How is this acceptable?

It is grossly unfair and perhaps even disrespectful for someone to work hard, use his or her money to build a residential property anywhere in the world, and for you to just travel and go and live there without paying a dime.

Even if the property is already built (cost already incurred), they worked for it and they have water, gas, and electricity bills to pay.

Basic respect and manners are lacking in our dealings with others. Many just care about cutting corners (saving their money) and what they will gain—without caring about others or the cost of their actions to others.

This nonsense too must stop.

—Chris-Vincent Agyapong,

A Hedonist, Contrarian, Lawyer, Atheist, Thinker, Writer, Minimalist & A Professional Truth Sayer